Saber X

When I asked Wolvy to help write this description, he said: “Why can’t they just look at the pictures?”

Since my pointy friend has the social aptitude of a recently neutered cat, he's gonna play the part of your least-favorite classmate during a group project and put in just enough effort to pass. You’ll be hearing from the mutton-chop mutant through the quotes I persuaded out of him using a 'Gentle Uplifting Nudge'.

When he finally agreed to hold this hilt, his first reaction was: “This one of them lightsticks?”

Despite his pop culture ignorance, he did eventually get the hang of this saber after doing some freestyle furniture disassembly. Once the desk had been reduced to a pile of smoldering particle boards, he asked: “Why did they make this thing look like my suit?”

Which is, of course, a ridiculous question – who doesn’t want more of that yellow bodysuit in their life? Besides, everyone knows that the lifeblood of a good hero is brand recognition, and nothing screams clawed Canuck like traffic-stopping spandex and a set of claws.

Speaking of, I am contractually obligated to relay the following monolog:

“This hilt features a first of its kind Reaver accessory, the Savage Claws. Pause for dramatic effect. Gesture towards the claws. These claws were weathered to make it look like they had been used in plenty of bar brawls. End of ad read.”

Truly moving. And if you buy this Wolver-Reaver with a “Space Katana”, you can finally give Tumblr what they want and ship us together. So slice first, ask questions never – get your hands all over the “Saber X”. Grab this beauty in the August RTS Drop that is happening this coming Saturday, August 17th at 9am EDT.

You better be ready, bub.