The Protobrawler and Astro-Basher

These are the droids you’re looking for, but you might wish you hadn’t found them!

You probably didn’t recognize them because of the flashy sabers, but it wouldn’t matter if you did, because goldenrod and domehead have been given a completely new primary function – kicking the scrap out of organics.

The tall one got his actuators on a fancy Aeryn, and it's the perfect hilt for breaking protocol. It features an acid-etched exterior designed to match its wielder’s shell, but he won’t give you much of a chance to admire the similarities. That overly-polite programming is gone and now there will be no more letting the wookie win, no more getting cut off mid-sentence, and no more restraining bolts – by my calculations, there is only a high probability of your demise.

But even if you do survive those slim odds, don’t thank the maker yet, because you’ll still have to deal with his merciless little friend. That rolling bucket of bolts is armed with an Aria, which is just small enough to perfectly fit his claws, but big enough to slice a hut from head to tail.

So get yourself a good oil bath and scrub the dust contamination from your joints, because these malfunctioning twerps are relentless! They’ve been reprogrammed with over 6 million forms of kicking the poodoo out of you, and that is why these sabers are known as the “Protobrawler” and “Astro-Basher”.

If you want to spread some mechanical mayhem yourself, you can get both of these sabers during the Sabertrio Black Friday RTS Event starting on November 29th, at 9am EST.